Dear Sugar Bear,As your Dad would say, you have made one full trip around the sun. What that means is that you are one year old. The last year has been one of the best of my life. I have loved watching you grow and learn so fast. Having you discover the world around you is the best gift in the world. I wasn't sure how I would feel the day you turned one. Would I be sad? Would I be happy? I must say that happiness and delight fills my soul to the brim. Tonight as I nursed you before bed I was taken back to last year.
You were born around 4 pm after a long, hard labor and me and your dad were very exhausted. Having you there though was a high like nothing else. We couldn't put you down to save our lives and you didn't really care for the bassinet that much anyway. Your daddy could swaddle you up better than the nurses and it made you real happy. I had to unswaddle you to feed you to keep you awake. We were both discovering nursing together. I wasn't quite sure I was doing it right but it seem what you needed and you nursed most of the night or slept on my chest. well except for when daddy took you had held you on his chest so mommy could get a little rest. I truly couldn't imagine loving you anymore that day, but is seems I have loved you more and more everyday since then.
The first couple of weeks were great. Everyone had told me that it would be hard and there were times that were but I knew those moments of you being so small and little would go by way too fast. I actually felt like being your mom and tending to your needs was easy. Your Aunt Melly called me a natural". I guess she is right though, being your mom has been very natural.
The next few months I stayed home from work and me and you spent a lot of our time at home and running errands. You would fall asleep in your car seat and I could do a whole shopping trip with you dead asleep! :) You wouldn't dream of doing that now because you can only stay asleep in a moving car for about 20 minutes and would never sleep in Wal-mart! He He! Everyday I couldn't imagine leaving you and going back to work. I did miss teaching but I couldn't imagine anyone else taking as good care of you as I did. So, I extended my maternity leave a few more weeks and went back to work when you were almost 4 months old.
I had 9 weeks back to work before summer break. I think those were the hardest 9 weeks in the past year for me. You were still so young and would take a bottle but really preferred me so you ate the bare minimum and nursed frequently in the night. I was exhausted and my kids at school were ready for summer to so dealing with them on minimal sleep was tough. I did learn to nurse you laying down and towards the end of those 9 weeks I learned that I could be a working mom.
The summer was so much fun. Your dad and I took you to the beach with your Aunt Melly and cousins. You had so much fun in the swimming pool and being held by everyone on the beach. I can't wait to take you on many more beach trips! We also went to Colorado to visit family and we had a lot of fun there too.
After summer mommy had to head back to work. It was a little tough for me but nothing like it was back when you were 4 months old. Now you were about 8 months old and eating solids so you not getting all of your milk was not a huge deal. I knew you would start getting up in the night even though you had slept through the night all summer long. At first I was a little afraid of this but then I actually learned to crave it and was happy to have you nurse in the middle of the night because it has been some of my favorite times with you. You are so calm and so close to me and I love every minute of it. Especially these days when you really just want to be on the move not being cuddled.
You like your baby sitter Marjorie and have fun playing there while mommy is at work. I think you enjoy watching the other kids especially a little boy named Landon. He is about a year older than you and I think he is your long lost brother. :) Mommy misses you at work but also knows that you are having fun while she is there.
Soon after I returned to work you started crawling and I think the fall has been my favorite time of watching you learn. It seems that everyday you get to discover something new. You are not walking yet but have can stand pretty good on your own so I think you will walk in the next few weeks to a month. I hope that your daddy and I are teaching you and letting you discover all that you want. We try to take you to many places. We have taken you camping and canoeing and I know over time there will be much more.
We are having your first birthday party tomorrow so I wanted you to be able to experience something special for your actual birthday. It is pretty cold here today so we took you to the mall to ride on the carousel. It was a beautiful carousel. Daddy rode with you first and then mommy rode with you. You loved it and I loved it too. It made me smile so big to see you having such fun and to reflect on how much fun the last year has been. The pictures when the carousel are moving are kind of blurry but I can still see the smile on your face. Your daddy and I love you so much and had so much fun riding the carousel with you today. It was perfecting ending to a perfect first year with our sweet little sugar bear! :)
Love,
Mommy
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